Hans—crazy Hans: I was feeding Galahad in the corner by Midnight’s house, and everyone else was up at the north end of the pasture grazing quietly. Suddenly I heard hoofbeats, and looked up to see Hans driving two of the other horses, at a gallop, straight down the fence line toward me. Darn guy. So I ducked under Galahad’s neck, stepped toward them, and cracked my little whip on the ground a few times. They did go around—even Hans—and Galahad, of course, just kept on eating. I swear Hans was smirking. He got NO carrots.

(Just to be clear: Had I been in any real danger, I would have ducked under the FENCE. But there was plenty of warning and these are horses I know well.)